talkymeat said: Cuddleable, carryable miniature human beings? I think you may have just described *babies*. When my kid was tiny, I would carry her inside my shirt like that, and if she wasn’t trying to tear off chunks of my chest hair, it was pretty damn adorable.
SO TRUE, my friend, so true. However, if I had the power to turn into a carry-able, miniature, human I probably wouldn’t shit, barf, or cry all the time because I would be in BLISS COUNTRY and still have the brain of a functioning, tax-paying, adult. So I would basically be whispering sweet nothings, stealthily answering your math equations, and looking up trivia on my iphone to make you sound smarter to everyone who didn’t know I was under your shirt all day long. Also, most babies are only adorable to their parents; it’s an evolutionary trait developed so we don’t eat them when they poop too much (I’m already good to go with the trivia!!!).